Surgery – and Other Things

Maezi here – I had a play day and then the next day, my doctor day.  My parents were very tense.  I really didn’t like being at the vet’s & they made me stay in a cage, but mostly they were all really nice to me & then I got very sleepy…

When I woke up, my throat was sore, but I was able to go home the next day.   I whined a little bit.  Or maybe a lot.   & I had this giant new costume to wear – they tell me it’s an “Elizabethan Collar” but it was fairly plain & modern looking, so I suppose, it is really more to the point technically, an “E-collar”.  If I’m going to have to wear one, (for 2 whole weeks!) I want it to be really “Elizabethan” & regal looking!  Where’s the trim, where’s the glitz?!

The ridiculous instructions for home care:
1- keep Maezi’s E-collar on.  Take off only when closely supervised.
2- don’t let Maezi scratch her incision
3- don’t let Maezi lick (any of her parts!)
4- don’t let her play with her toys or RUN anywhere
5- don’t let her go up/down steps or jump on/off the couch
6- crate her for sleeping at night if you think that she might get jostled in bed

Don’t, don’t, don’t!  I showed ’em.  Well, I went IN to the crate.  & I whined & cried & carried on.  I just wanted to be in my rightful place in bed between their feet.  I really wanted some more TLC.  So, while Mom persevered & fell asleep despite my incessant whining, Dad couldn’t take it (ha!) & took me OUT of the crate AND put me up on the bed.  He always was a pushover!  Thereby waking up Mom, (I’ve never heard such language!) & then she got up & put me in a soft harness on a leash around her wrist so I couldn’t fall off the bed.  Then HE promptly fell back asleep.  & SHE had to get up at 3:00 AM to take me outside & give me my pill… for a week – ha ha ha ha ha!

Since I was finally in that warm comfy big ole bed, I knew I’d be soooo much more comfortable naked – so there was only one course of action – I assumed my “Houndini” persona & escaped…

I like variations – sometimes, I can get the entire collar off.  Other times, I just stick my whole front leg through the hole.  It creates sort of an asymmetrical weirdness that still doesn’t get me out of the whole thing, looks really stupid & kinda cramps my style.  Whoops!  Then one night, I even got out of my “side-locked” harness!  Still laughing about that one, ‘cuz they never figured out how I did it.  I will say, that one tired me out.


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